Is sex important?
You bet! “Sex is an important aspect of every relationship – sometimes even more important than we would dare to admit… Emotions will feed your soul, food will keep the body functioning, but there’s one thing that can feed them both at once – sex,” wrote Jelena Javonovic
As men grow older, however, sex takes on a new shape, a new meaning, probably new ways of execution, and definitely in frequency. Not, perhaps, because you have had so many of it to make it feel like, “what’s new?”kind of thing – but more of the changes due to aging.
Though a lot of middle-aged men will still claim to be sexually active at their age (more fiction than fact), but medical science says that male testosterone starts going down at 30. By 40 to 50, depending on one’s health, a man’s tank has barely enough gas to avoid a crash landing or get to the nearest filling station.
Other than the pituitary glands testosterone-production capacity limitations, other changes will occur, physically, mentally and emotionally, that directly impact man’s sex life.
The three most common are:
1. Physiological Changes:
As men age, so do their bodies. They start having aches and pains, on top of other potentially sex-inhibiting medical illnesses like diabetes, heart problems, arthritis and many more.
Their knees, hips, and backs get in the way of torrid sex, their stamina can’t take them a few steps away from the starting line, and their huge bellies make penetration like going over a road hump.
All these may be minor things to more sex-determined guys, but can be inhibiting to most that they start taking sex more of an ordeal than a pleasure – unwittingly feed erectile dysfunction, a very distressing sexual health condition common among men at 40 and beyond.
2. Psychological Changes:
In their younger years, men took sex as an exercise of having their penis hard enough to get in, do its job, and then get out – doggie style in the strictest sense of the word.
For family-inclined guys, it is to make babies.
In both cases, however, at midlife they will realize that exciting and satisfying sex is not a solo performance but a duet. Feelings of intimacy drive sexual desire, not animalistic instinct.
They will soon realize that to dance well, they must dance together – one beautiful step after another, to the precise beat of music of love.
And they will experiment several dance styles. They will try the tango, the waltz, foxtrot, and, for more variation, the Gangnam style.
They will experiment with other forms of intercourse like oral sex or the Old Man’s sex.
Story has it that an 80 yr-old guy was showing off his newly born baby with his 18 yr-old wife.
“Isn’t she beautiful?” showing off his daughter to his friends. Then continued, “And she’s handmade, too.”
3. Emotional Changes:
At midlife, man’s muscle mass softens as well as his emotions; as his belly grows, so does his patience (hopefully). He becomes considerate, tolerant, indulging, and compassionate.
Sex takes on a new personality. Rather than treating is like a fast-food, now he is fine dining.
He doesn’t do it often enough, but when he does, he does it in style – perfect ambiance, excellent wine, a violinist by his table and everything the house can offer.
He consults with her partner what she would like to order, and, while eating, frequently asks her endearing questions, i.e., is the food good, or is it cooked just right, or does it suit your tastes?
When necessary, he foregoes his own pleasures so his partner can have more of it. He would even indulge her to a second or third serving, just to make sure she has her fill of passionate excitement.
Sex at the emotional level is the most satisfying, most lasting and most memorable. It is what solid relationships are built on. It binds man and woman together.